Funny Incidents

Inzamam-ul-Haq's Comedy Run-Out Collection

2005-01-01Pakistan vs VariousVarious Pakistan Matches2 min readSeverity: Mild

Summary

Inzamam-ul-Haq's legendary lack of pace between the wickets produced some of cricket's most comically slow run-outs.

What Happened

If there was an award for the most entertainingly slow runner in cricket history, Inzamam-ul-Haq would win it by several metres — which is ironic, because he was usually several metres short of the crease when run out. The Pakistani batting genius was so slow between the wickets that his run-outs became a sub-genre of cricket comedy, a reliable source of entertainment that fans could depend on like clockwork.

Inzamam's running was characterized by a curious lumbering gait that suggested he was running through treacle while carrying a piano on his back. He would set off for a run, realize halfway down that he wasn't going to make it, and then just keep going anyway with the resigned air of a man heading to the gallows. There was never any acceleration, never any desperation — just a steady, dignified lumber towards inevitable doom. The dive at the end — when it came — was more of a gentle topple, like a felled tree in slow motion.

His most famous run-out involved him being sent back by his partner but being unable to turn around quickly enough, resulting in both batsmen ending up at the same end while the fielding team casually removed the bails as if they had all the time in the world. Which they did, because Inzamam's turning circle was roughly equivalent to that of an ocean liner. On another occasion, he was run out without the fielding team even having to throw — the wicketkeeper simply walked to the stumps and removed the bails while Inzamam was still several yards short, moving at a pace that could charitably be described as "leisurely" and accurately described as "geological."

His teammates learned to never call him for a quick single, but somehow it kept happening. "Yes!" they'd shout, setting off at a sprint. Inzamam would look up, begin his ponderous journey, and the entire stadium would collectively hold its breath. The result was almost always the same: a run-out that looked like it had been filmed in slow motion, even at normal speed.

⚖️ The Verdict

Inzamam was living proof that you can be a batting genius and still run like you're wading through cement. His run-outs were cricket's slapstick gold.

Related Incidents

😂Mild

Harry Jupp — The Surrey Stonewaller and His Impenetrable Defence, 1860s

Surrey and England representative sides

1863-06-01

Harry Jupp of Surrey was one of Victorian cricket's great defensive batsmen — a stonewaller of such impenetrable technique that contemporaries called him 'Young Stonewall' and marvelled at his ability to bat through entire sessions without apparent risk of dismissal. His method was unromantic but effective; he scored over 23,000 first-class runs at an average of 22, represented England in the first two Test matches of 1876–77, and drove bowlers to distraction with a patience that the entertainment-hungry Victorian public occasionally found trying.

#overarm-era#early-county-cricket#1860s
😂Mild

James Southerton — Surrey's Elderly Spin Bowling Discovery, 1860s

Surrey and England representative sides

1861-06-01

James Southerton of Surrey was a right-arm off-break bowler who played first-class cricket from 1854 to 1879 and made history in 1877 when, aged 49 years and 119 days, he became the oldest man ever to play Test cricket on debut — representing England in the very first Test match at Melbourne. His long career and late-blooming international recognition made him one of Victorian cricket's most unusual figures.

#overarm-era#early-county-cricket#1860s
😂Mild

Women's Cricket in the 1840s — Village Matches and the Continuing Tradition

Women's cricket clubs, principally Surrey and Kent

1846-08-01

Women's cricket in the 1840s continued the tradition of village women's matches that had been established in the eighteenth century, with fixtures between women's sides from villages in Surrey and Kent drawing curious crowds who came as much to watch an unusual spectacle as to follow the cricket. The matches were informal and commercially insignificant but their persistence through the mid-Victorian era maintained a continuous women's cricket tradition that the late Victorian women's clubs would later build upon.

#roundarm-era#early-victorian#1840s